No way out

Contrary to CNN's false teaser headline ("Ticker: Minnesota Republican to skip convention"), Norm Coleman (R-MN) is going to the Republican convention in St. Paul. He just wishes he weren't. He wishes he didn't have to be associated with all the laughingstock Bushist bullshitters who will be appearing there in prime time.

Many of his Senate caucus-mates are trying to alibi out of the Duhbya disaster by staying home. They're saying, "George Duhbya Bush? I've met him, but we're not friends. Acquaintances, no more."

Coleman will be keeping his head down, even though he fits right in with the Bushists. I expect Al Franken to take full advantage of the conservatism-induced stupor that will be on bald display in their back yard.

For the Republican Senate cowards who suddenly don't want to be anywhere in the frame with Duhbya or Darth, the association is still easy to make:

• Open: empty chair
• "Fill in the blank is skipping the Republican convention this year."
• Fade into montage of the two embracing, signing legislation, grinning together.
  
• "After all these years of supporting in lock step every Republican disaster from George Duhbya Bush and Dick Cheney, fill in the blank is now ashamed of them and doesn't want his picture taken with them."
• Stop on the most damning photo.
  
• "Wouldn't it be better for name of state to skip Republican fill in the blank?"
• Fade to candid of Democratic challenger out listening to the voters.
  
• "Vote name of Democrat."
• Fill the seat with someone who'll change directions for the sake of America.
• (FEC blah-blah-blah)