Ne'er the Twain shall meet

The Constitution is in tatters, and the Justice Department is too ornery to look into alleged Bushist crimes, but Congress wants Roger Clemens investigated for perjury. Yeah, he probably lied under oath, and that's bad, and he's a well-known pinhead diva, but is this really that important?

(Note: I was hoping to find a delicious pun riffing on the shared name Clemens that would connect mark twain's meaning - 2 fathoms or 12 feet - with Roger's Red Sox uniform number, 21. Y'know, did he play in the Palind[r]ome? But today it seems that lame is all I have - like Clemens's alibis about steroids.)