Rove roves

Why is Karl Rove leaving the White House now? In any Bushist media event, always look for the lies.

It's not to spend more time with his family, but it is a pretty funny joke that the White House has put that out as their protective lie, since everyone knows that more time with family is a synonym for fired.

No, Turdblossom was not fired. Are you kidding? He's one of two indispensable men in the Cheney administration. (The other is Darth Cheney himself.)

Did Rove leave because Josh Bolten said he had to? That Rove had to leave now or commit to stay to the end? Sure, Josh Bolten is telling Duhbya that Rove has to leave! Pigs would have to fly a lot further than Texas to make that true. If you believe that, don't take any sales calls from subprime mortgage resellers.

Rove left because he thought he would be more effective outside of the White House than in it. He also chose a time when Duhbya has had a slight uptick in the polls into the mid-30s. The fact that the uptick comes from weak-minded Republicans who believe the "surge is working" propaganda because they so devoutly want to believe it.

Why would Rove think himself more effective outside the White House? A few reasons:

• He's unpopular and knows that his distance will help Duhbya, his creation.
• He hopes that people who don't pay attention (swing voters!) will now stop thinking about how thoroughly his specialty, propaganda, dominates the Republican playbook.
• The phone works to Texas. The press might ask if Rove's home includes a secure video link. Better avoid deceptive denials - ask him if he will have access to a secure link of any kind.
• Everyone knows that Duhbya is a lame duck already. We're all dreaming of 01.20.09 and the relief that day should bring. Rove outside the White House has much more maneuvering room to find and help the Republicans in 2008. He says he's out of politics. Right! This operator couldn't leave politics without a do-not-resuscitate order.
• He probably is ready to cash in. The book story is probably true, and Rove knows his wingnut market won't be interested in history, so his self-serving inside spin has a limited shelf life. Also, the speech circuit beckons. Still, loyal Republicans don't have impoverished retirements, so this is probably a minor consideration. Halliburton directorship, anyone?

The only safe way to keep the whole lot of these authoritarians from major post-office bad press is to get another authoritarian Republican elected in any way possible. There are only three Republicans who can possibly win in 2008 - Romney, Giuliani, and the one remaining Thompson. Outside the White House, Rove can play footsie with all three.

Rove's favorite would have to be Thompson. He's an actor and a bullshit artist. He's from the South and has long experience faking populism. He has major feet of clay and no clear principles but lusts for power. In short, he's a perfect Republican cipher into which Rove could pour the Bushist bullshit. (Of course, Giuliani would be better thematically, but will he take direction?)